Degenerative disc disease...

Sit down and tell us what's wrong with you.

Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by DI Burnside @ Wed Mar 05, 2014 4:35 pm

Good news HGL.

I saved you as seat in 'Dribbles Corner'.
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by Boo @ Wed Mar 05, 2014 4:36 pm

Jesus, that sounds horrific.

Make sure you don't leave hospital without your penis and take plenty of morphine.
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by DI Burnside @ Wed Mar 05, 2014 4:43 pm

Intrapeanus morphine !
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by HappyGoLucky @ Wed Mar 05, 2014 4:54 pm

Boo wrote:Jesus, that sounds horrific.

Make sure you don't leave hospital without your penis and take plenty of morphine.

Given what they've done and how they went about it, I did expect some pain; just not this much.

Penis will be coming with me, I realised just how attached to it I am this morning!

I've told them not to replace the morphine I've got now as the pain is becoming more bearable, I'll probably regret that at some stage tonight.
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by HappyGoLucky @ Wed Mar 05, 2014 4:55 pm

DI Burnside wrote:Intrapeanus morphine !

Your lot were doing it wrong!
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by Cloggy @ Wed Mar 05, 2014 5:26 pm

Well done mate, get well soon.
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by Tumescent Acorn @ Wed Mar 05, 2014 6:05 pm

Yeah, don't skimp on the pain killers.

Brilliant news and swift recovery... penis recovery...penicovery.

You know what ? Nurses are all fcuking munters these days - sign of the times.
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by DI Burnside @ Wed Mar 05, 2014 6:07 pm

All the cute ones are at Addenbrooke's :)
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by Strawman @ Wed Mar 05, 2014 7:41 pm

Swift recovery HGL.
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by HappyGoLucky @ Thu Mar 06, 2014 8:39 am

Tumescent Acorn wrote:Yeah, don't skimp on the pain killers.

Brilliant news and swift recovery... penis recovery...penicovery.

You know what ? Nurses are all fcuking munters these days - sign of the times.

Off all the drips now, and they've taken what felt like three feet of tubing out my poor abused peanus. Just had the drain taken out which wasn't a pleasant experience.

Last nights shift of nurses were deffo, chosen to work in the dark, but todays shift includes the Corsican and the punk who are both delightful
Walking around a lot more more, but still wobbly; hope to be out of here tomorrow.
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by minimoog @ Thu Mar 06, 2014 10:57 am

I still get cold sweats when I think of the pain of being catheterised last year. fcuking horrific it was. The worst pain I have ever experienced.
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by HappyGoLucky @ Thu Mar 06, 2014 11:37 am

minimoog wrote:I still get cold sweats when I think of the pain of being catheterised last year. fcuking horrific it was. The worst pain I have ever experienced.

Knowing how it felt coming out, I don't want to imagine it going in! Thankfully they put it in while I was in theatre so I had no idea until I came around in the recovery room.
I have to admit, I nearly threw up with the sensation of the nurse pulling out the drain this morning; I think it was actually even worse than her removing the catheter - just.

One of the nurses thinks that because I skipped the pain killers early and I'm now off the anti-biotic drip and catheter free, I might be able to go home this evening... Fingers crossed, I need to make sure the old boy still functions properly after all the abuse!
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by minimoog @ Thu Mar 06, 2014 11:41 am

HappyGoLucky wrote:Thankfully they put it in while I was in theatre so I had no idea until I came around in the recovery room.


Same here. It just felt progressively more excruciating as the post-op meds wore off. The other blokes on my ward didn't seem too bothered by theirs.

By about 1am and after all the painkillers I was allowed I couldn't stand any more and the nurse agreed to remove it - instant relief.
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by DI Burnside @ Thu Mar 06, 2014 12:30 pm

Obviously the smaller your cock the more it hurts.

I was awake when they put one in and it was merely uncomfortable.
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by Tokyo Sexwale @ Thu Mar 06, 2014 12:32 pm

It's a testament to modern surgery that you've literally had your spine replaced and the worst bit of it is the cock pain! I'm not belittling your poor en-tubed peanus but I'd have thought it would be the least of your worries.

Impressive surgery!
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by DI Burnside @ Thu Mar 06, 2014 12:38 pm

Impressive, pah, it barely lasted a morning !
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by HappyGoLucky @ Thu Mar 06, 2014 1:25 pm

DI Burnside wrote:Obviously the more std's you've had the less it hurts.

I was awake when they put one in and it was merely uncomfortable.

I suppose you're used to them doing that thing with the little umbrella we saw in those documentaries at school which has reamed your japs eye out to the point you could fit another man in there without issue?
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by minimoog @ Thu Mar 06, 2014 1:26 pm

I had two tubes up mine.
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by HappyGoLucky @ Thu Mar 06, 2014 1:29 pm

DI Burnside wrote:Impressive, pah, it barely lasted a morning !

My spine may have been fcuked, but at least it was easy for them to find & work on... How many of those hours were they rattling round in your skull looking for the addled husk that was hiding the tumour. :tongue:
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by HappyGoLucky @ Thu Mar 06, 2014 1:30 pm

minimoog wrote:I had two tubes up mine.

Why the fcuk would you need two up there??
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by minimoog @ Thu Mar 06, 2014 1:33 pm

HappyGoLucky wrote:
minimoog wrote:I had two tubes up mine.

Why the fcuk would you need two up there??


One draining a kidney directly, and one draining the bladder.

:winces:
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by DI Burnside @ Thu Mar 06, 2014 1:49 pm

Are you sure you haven't got a vagina ?
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by minimoog @ Thu Mar 06, 2014 1:56 pm

DI Burnside wrote:Are you sure you haven't got a vagina ?


Not with me.
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by HappyGoLucky @ Thu Mar 06, 2014 2:03 pm

minimoog wrote:
DI Burnside wrote:Are you sure you haven't got a vagina ?


Not with me.

S'ok, there's a fair few cnuts around here should you need one!
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by minimoog @ Thu Mar 06, 2014 2:21 pm

HappyGoLucky wrote:
minimoog wrote:
DI Burnside wrote:Are you sure you haven't got a vagina ?


Not with me.

S'ok, there's a fair few cnuts around here should you need one!


:D
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Re: Degenerative disc disease...

Post by HappyGoLucky @ Sat Mar 08, 2014 9:51 am

Tokyo Sexwale wrote:It's a testament to modern surgery that you've literally had your spine replaced and the worst bit of it is the cock pain! I'm not belittling your poor en-tubed peanus but I'd have thought it would be the least of your worries.

Impressive surgery!


Certainly is... It only hit me when I got back back home yesterday afternoon and was putting away all the x-rays. This was put into me on Tuesday morning
MyBack.jpg
Stapled!
MyBack.jpg (233.9 KiB) Viewed 13823 times

and I walked the dogs this morning!
Staples come out in 14 days.
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