Is there a doctor in the house?

Sit down and tell us what's wrong with you.

Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by Doctor Congo @ Mon Dec 24, 2018 7:48 am

HappyGoLucky wrote:
Doctor Congo wrote:
Pressures sound ok but there’s a risk it can suddenly go very high. Monofocal lenses are fine. It just means near vision will need reading glasses to correct after surgery which is no big deal.

Lol good luck with the mates rates!

Was surprised we didn't get any drops to bring the pressure down, but checking with his office today, just to be sure.

I'm pretty sure I saw an advert somewhere saying that a donation of just fifty pounds could give the gift of sight to someone with cataracts in a far off land, what does that get the poor buggers a marble? Having got the quote, I can saying it's reassuringly more expensive than that!

Initial indications from our insurers are that they they're going to cover it, so hopefully it'll just be the excess we have to pay.


The pressures might be fine at the moment but there’s a risk they can shoot up high and may have done previously, if your wife gets sudden onset of pain and haloes around lights she must see an ophthalmologist immediately.

£50 will pay for a fairly basic cataract op in an eye camp but might not pay for a lens in the eye. That will still be a huge improvement for some in the 3rd world. Having worked in such camps you can really make a huge difference with a small donation.
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by HappyGoLucky @ Tue Mar 19, 2019 8:40 am

Doctor Congo wrote:If you’re in Singapore, there’s a guy I know well called Shamira Perera, who is top notch that I’ve known since Med School


Thanks for the recommendation Doc, MrsHGL signed off with near perfect vision. Shamira is a really excellent guy, patient & reassuring throughout the process.
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by Doctor Congo @ Tue Mar 19, 2019 6:15 pm

HappyGoLucky wrote:
Doctor Congo wrote:If you’re in Singapore, there’s a guy I know well called Shamira Perera, who is top notch that I’ve known since Med School


Thanks for the recommendation Doc, MrsHGL signed off with near perfect vision. Shamira is a really excellent guy, patient & reassuring throughout the process.


Fab! Am happy to hear it!!
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by span @ Tue Mar 19, 2019 6:35 pm

Great news, HGL!
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by Tokyo Sexwale @ Tue Mar 19, 2019 7:25 pm

Nice. CTFs (well Dr C’s) reach is impressive.
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by HappyGoLucky @ Wed Mar 20, 2019 1:39 am

span wrote:Great news, HGL!


It's not all good though Span....

These new supereyes see things the old broken ones wouldn't have noticed. Foreggs there was a conversation at the weekend that went along the lines of...

When did you change that? >points at shiny new crank on gravel bike< followed by Are those new tyres? >points at shiny new tyres on gravel bike< What was wrong with the old ones?

I pointed out that what we're saving in contact lenses more than covers the crank and tyres so it's all good.
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by S1K @ Wed Mar 20, 2019 2:43 am

Sounds like you’re under increased supervision HGL

Ba Dum Tss
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by HappyGoLucky @ Wed Mar 20, 2019 7:08 am

S1K wrote:Sounds like you’re under increased supervision HGL

Ba Dum Tss


Indeed!
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by Doctor Congo @ Wed Mar 20, 2019 8:42 am

S1K wrote:Sounds like you’re under increased supervision HGL

Ba Dum Tss


Boom!

I’m very glad to hear she can see much better. It’s often the most gratifying thing to hear patients jokingly moaning about all the wrinkles they couldn’t see before but now can!
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by span @ Wed Mar 20, 2019 9:42 am

HappyGoLucky wrote:
span wrote:Great news, HGL!


It's not all good though Span....

These new supereyes see things the old broken ones wouldn't have noticed.

:D

You just need your hearing to start going for marital harmony to resume.
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by DI Burnside @ Wed Mar 20, 2019 9:54 am

Can she see your peanus yet though...
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by Doctor Congo @ Wed Mar 20, 2019 2:54 pm

DI Burnside wrote:Can she see your peanus yet though...


My mates not a miracle worker!!
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by HappyGoLucky @ Thu Mar 21, 2019 12:30 am

span wrote:
HappyGoLucky wrote:
span wrote:Great news, HGL!


It's not all good though Span....

These new supereyes see things the old broken ones wouldn't have noticed.

:D

You just need your hearing to start going for marital harmony to resume.

What?
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by HappyGoLucky @ Thu Mar 21, 2019 12:38 am

DI Burnside wrote:Can she see your peanus yet though...

It's like Uranus, hard to see with the naked eye!

Doctor Congo wrote:My mates not a miracle worker!!

Your mate? Seriously?

I've seen him more times than you have in the last 20 years! I think you should just let it go Doc, he's moved on and you should too.
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by CJ+ @ Thu Mar 21, 2019 7:14 am

You've been jilted, doc! Fight him!
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by span @ Thu Mar 21, 2019 7:23 am

Well he told me that he's only nice to either of you because he feels awks.

Me and him are going Bluewater on Saturday.
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by Doctor Congo @ Thu Mar 21, 2019 1:51 pm

HappyGoLucky wrote:
DI Burnside wrote:Can she see your peanus yet though...

It's like Uranus, hard to see with the naked eye!

Doctor Congo wrote:My mates not a miracle worker!!

Your mate? Seriously?

I've seen him more times than you have in the last 20 years! I think you should just let it go Doc, he's moved on and you should too.


Bah

The small matter of him living in Singapore might’ve been a slight difficulty in meeting up.

I knew him when he was a lad and many a night out with him at med school. I know all his dark secrets!!
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by CJ+ @ Thu Mar 21, 2019 2:04 pm

Doctor Congo wrote:I know all his dark secrets!!


I hear you're a racist now, Doctor.
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by Doctor Congo @ Thu Mar 21, 2019 2:05 pm

CJ+ wrote:
Doctor Congo wrote:I know all his dark secrets!!


I hear you're a racist now, Doctor.


Hah

Too bloody right! Brexit Britain!!
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by Damien Thorn @ Thu Jul 18, 2019 8:32 am

Baffling.

Last night I noticed an itchy patch inside my elbow while I was minding my business watching telly. Within a few minutes it seemed to be a series of raised bumps and I thought I'd been assaulted by a gnat or something, the cheeky sod.

But less than an hour later, I had large areas of raised red welts on my skin, tremendously itchy and bizarrely puffed up. I'm taking about really swollen up, too - bumps the size of perhaps a baked beans, and others raised sections with much larger area but swollen the same amount. Inside both elbows, armpits, across the base of my stomach, down both sides of the torso, both sides of my neck.

I took a couple of anti histamine tablets and went to bed fearing the worst, but slept well and woke up this morning absolutely fine.

What the AF was that?
Last edited by Damien Thorn on Thu Jul 18, 2019 8:35 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by Deuteronomy @ Thu Jul 18, 2019 8:43 am

Damien Thorn wrote:Baffling.

Last night I noticed an itchy patch inside my elbow while I was minding my business watching telly. Within a few minutes it seemed to be a series of raised bumps and I thought I'd been assaulted by a gnat or something, the cheeky sod.

But less than an hour later, I had large areas of raised red welts on my skin, tremendously itchy and bizarrely puffed up. I'm taking about really swollen up, too - bumps the size of perhaps a baked beans, and others raised sections with much larger area but swollen the same amount. Inside both elbows, armpits, across the base of my stomach, down both sides of the torso, both sides of my neck.

I took a couple of anti histamine tablets and went to bed fearing the worst, but slept well and woke up this morning absolutely fine.

What the AF was that?


>puts on pince-nez<

>looks intently at Damo's arm<

.
...
.....

>sucks teeth<

Still, your wife is young enough to make another life without you, so you needn't worry about that.

>awks silence<

>gently pushes invoice across table<

Cash for preference please.
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by Damien Thorn @ Thu Jul 18, 2019 9:13 am

Oh!

Have you got change for a ten pound note?
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by Deuteronomy @ Thu Jul 18, 2019 9:24 am

Damien Thorn wrote:Oh!

Have you got change for a ten pound note?


No, not been to the bank yet, so I'll just credit you next time yeah? Yes, don't worry, I'll make a note - forget my own head.

>stares at Damo<

>pointedly looks at door<

I expect you'll want to see your wife.

>presses intercom button<

Gillian?.... GILLIAN! Where is that bloody woman, GILLIAN!!

Ah, Gillian, will you see Mr Thorn out, I explained about the lack of float, so just take for the ten pounds, no receipt as it's cash.

>beams at Damo<

See you again soo- er, well... Goodbye Mr Thorn.
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by thekungfury @ Thu Jul 18, 2019 9:45 am

Can’t wait until they hatch. You’ve still got your Go-Pro yes?
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by Pigeon @ Thu Jul 18, 2019 6:45 pm

Damien Thorn wrote:What the AF was that?


Trains.

Your lymphatic system has been hit by the industrial revolution and little gnomes are building railways in it. The lumps are railway works in your lymph nodes, so like if you stand slightly sideways you've got Doncaster in one armpit and Crewe in the other, sort of thing. They swell up when the trains are all being built and are accumulating there, and then go down again when the trains come out and start running around your body. Soon you'll probably find your farts smell of diesel, if they're diesel trains, or else if they're steam ones your arse will start chuffing steam.
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by Doctor Congo @ Thu Jul 18, 2019 7:33 pm

Damien Thorn wrote:Baffling.

Last night I noticed an itchy patch inside my elbow while I was minding my business watching telly. Within a few minutes it seemed to be a series of raised bumps and I thought I'd been assaulted by a gnat or something, the cheeky sod.

But less than an hour later, I had large areas of raised red welts on my skin, tremendously itchy and bizarrely puffed up. I'm taking about really swollen up, too - bumps the size of perhaps a baked beans, and others raised sections with much larger area but swollen the same amount. Inside both elbows, armpits, across the base of my stomach, down both sides of the torso, both sides of my neck.

I took a couple of anti histamine tablets and went to bed fearing the worst, but slept well and woke up this morning absolutely fine.

What the AF was that?


Distribution sounds like eczema. Rapidity and resolution sounds like allergy.
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by S1K @ Thu Jul 18, 2019 8:12 pm

That happened to me a few months ago except I was asleep at the time.

I woke up in the middle of the night and found that I was having a histamine reaction from my mid thighs to about my navel. The skin was raised and blotchy and stretched tight and itchy as all hell. I rubbed Anthisan all over and tried to go back to sleep and in the morning it had gone.

A few nights ago my left leg started itching badly and looked the same, like I’d been stung by stinging nettles so I took a Piriton and it went away.

I haven’t got bed bugs so I don’t know what is causing it or whether it will happen again.
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by Damien Thorn @ Fri Jul 19, 2019 7:47 am

I wrote a massive post just now about this, but it's gone and I cba to do it again.

This came back last night and I went to the hospital walk-in. It got much worse. Doctor said it's an acute urticarial allergic reaction to "something". Got a prescription to fill if anti-histamines don't sort it, but I took more a-h last night and again it's mostly gone this morning. It was MUCH worse last night though.

This morning everything's still itchy and red, like I've got sunburn - but all the inflammation and most of the swelling has gone. Not my hands though, they're still live balloons!

Image

I can usually so my wedding ring off pretty easily. Today it won't even move.
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by Disastrous @ Fri Jul 19, 2019 7:52 am

Shit! That’s quite scary...

Any ideas what might be causing it?
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Re: Is there a doctor in the house?

Post by Il Duce @ Fri Jul 19, 2019 8:15 am

Disastrous wrote:Shit! That’s quite scary...

Any ideas what might be causing it?


Well it's his left hand so it could be from sitting on it.
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